The Lives of Abused and Battered Women

Biographies & Memoirs

By Barbara Hart

Publisher : Infinity

ABOUT Barbara Hart

Barbara Hart
I'm the mother of five, and the author of three books, "The Lives of Abused and Battered Women", "Heart-Boosting Poetry" and "Love On The Rocks, Abuse And Power Pointers". My purpose in life is to give hope and inpiration to others. Because of my abusive life More...



A book that tells of my life as well as that of other women due to abuse. It was written to give hope to the hopeless, allowing others to know that they are not alone in the midst of their storm or trials. A book fillled with kind words and gestures to be used for the uplifting of other womens hearts and spirits.

“The Lives of Abused and Battered Women” This book was written to tell the story of abuse the only way that it could be, by someone who knew what it was truly about. No one can tell it better than someone who had walked a mile or two in the shoes of abuse. For twenty-five years I lived the live of being abused. The cold harsh words, betrayal, and physical abuse were all I ever had to look forward to. Being told that no one would want you for, but only one thing made me stay in the relationships. I felt that if I left the relationship, no one would want me because no one seemed to be interested in me anyway. In and out of every relationship it was always the same thing, taking what my mates dished out in order to have a man in my life, and I thought that they loved me. I always prayed that my mates would change, and begin to treat me the way that I deserved to be treated. Being picked at and taunted by people who knew what was going on in their cold, harsh, and sneaky ways. The thought of being told that, ‘if you couldn’t hang with the big dog that you should stay on the porch’, which only meant that I either accept what they were dishing out, or that I could go somewhere else. I knew that it wasn’t right to be treated that way, but I had low-self esteem. I lived that live style all those years, then it hit me, I finally realized that I was better than that. It hit me one day that God allowed me to go through my trials, to strengthen me so that I wouldn’t allow anyone to treat me that way ever again. Then I was told by a minister at church that it was Gods’ will for me to tell my story to be a blessing to other women (men). I wanted to be an inspiration to the young children that may be tempted to get into this kind of relationship not knowing what they were in for. I wrote this book to tell of my abusive lifestyle as well as that of other women. I wanted them to know that the only way that the situation would change was if they stopped accepting it. It tells of how women do things to other women, taking their men, and feeling that they had done something big. If only we had walked away at the first sign of abuse, things would have been better. It’s time for us to stand up for our rights. It’s a subject that is not on only in the low-class minority of women; it’s in the in the middle class, and high minority of women also. Hiding abuse under the rug only makes a lump, then a mold hill, and then it turns into a mountain that can’t be climbed. I wanted to be a blessing to anyone that had not been abused, and to the ones that were still living it. My heart and prayers are with them. Barbara Hart

Inspirational, courageous and brilliantly written, October 19, 2009 The Lives of Abused and Battered Women
By Author: Barbara Ann Hart

Reviewed by Fran Lewis

When a woman believes that it is okay to become someone's punching bag she is sending herself a poor message. When a woman feels that she has the inability to place the fault on the person who is punching her and creating the abuse, she needs to rethink and reaffirm her rights as a person and whom she really is.

There are many kinds of abuse that people endure throughout their lives. Whether it is child, sexual, physical, emotion, intimidation or verbal abuse, it is still wrong and the abuser needs to be dealt with and made to realize that their actions and words will not go unpunished.

Emotional abuse is more harmful and detrimental than you think. The scars are hidden and cannot be seen on the outside but are ever lasting ones that often destroy the person's self-esteem, self-respect and feelings of self-worth. No one has the right to do this to anyone in any way.

As our author so brilliantly tells her story and shares the many experiences she encountered when dealing with different types of abuse and abusers, we learn some serious lessons that must be taught and remembered by all women. One of the worst things that can happen to a person as described by the author is being made to feel that you are worthless and not good enough to be in anyone's air space and because of that you deserve the poor hand that you are being dealt. Men often abuse women because they have low self images, low self-esteem and in order to make themselves feel self-important and more in control, they try intimidation, fear, guilt, shame and physical harm in order to take strong, powerful and intelligent women down into the pits of the gutter where these men really reside.
As the author shares many of the true life incidents that she went through and others close to her too, we learn that men often become violent and abusive when women are more successful than they are, have better jobs, can handle difficult issues better than they can and can move on in many different directions when things do not work out for them. They demean and verbally insult the women causing some women to self-inflict their own abuse on themselves by feeling they deserve to be unhappy when their partner is too. NO YOU ARE NOT!
Women need to realize that who and what they are is just fine. Take a paper and make a list of all the things that you want for yourself and in life and post it on a wall in a room, bulletin board in just in notebook. At the top of the list label it THIS IS WHAT I WANT FOR ME in order to make your life go on an uphill climb. Our author related stories about women who felt the need to put the desires of men ahead of theirs and were often deflated and left alone when the desires were met and they found someone else to fill them in what they feel might be a better way. Take that list and add to it what you want in a partner and the qualities that you both should have to make the relationship work. Then, decide what you need for your success and do not settle for less.
The one thing that my mother taught me and I have never forgotten till this day is to be financially independent of any man whether a husband, boyfriend or anyone and never ask for anything that you cannot get for yourself. Marriage is a definite partnership with each party sharing the responsibilities whether financial, household chores and more. But, when one person forgets his place and decides that mistreating the other is the only way he can find an excuse to wander, leave and default on his responsibilities, it is your job to show him the door and keep it locked or better yet change the locks. She also taught me after many years of learning the hard way, that you must never love someone more than they love you and put your needs at the top of the list.
The message conveyed in this book is meant for women and men. No one has the right to debase, demoralize or diminish the inner soul, inner being and inner core of another person. There are many gears people use when driving a car and the one that you must never use when dealing in a relationship is reverse. Move ahead and drive and establish yourself as a brave, courageous and independent women who can manage on her own and when she feels the need for companionship it will be on her terms and with the understanding that her rights and feelings will not be violated.
The author tells about women and describes how they cheat with other women's partners whether married or not. These women are not as self-assured as you would think. They need control and they need to feel important and in order to do that they prey on good; kind and unsuspecting women who they feel are weaker than they are and will succumb to their rude and mentally dismantling ways. Men who cheat do it to feel virile, dominant and in their own terms manlier. Not so, they are just are little boys who want to feel grown up in an adult's body and if the situation were reversed and you left them, they will not see it as anything that they might have done but blame it on you.

It takes a woman of courage, valor and integrity to open her life and her heart to her readers and share her experiences with us in order to inspire and teach other women and even men that any kind of abuse is wrong and we will not stand for it. Women often demean and can be hurtful when a man loses his job or becomes ill and cannot work. Inexcusable. But, when that same man does not appreciate the loyalty, kindness and compassion afforded to him by his companion or partner, then he needs a lesson in more than just plain humility and kindness. Life is meant to be spent doing what makes us happy and brings joy into our hearts and minds. God is watching over all of us and will always be there when we need him.
Barbara Ann Hart has written a book that is meant to remind us everyone is unique and special in his or her own right. Everyone has a voice and it must never be silenced. Everyone is capable of love and when someone denies you that love or makes you feel less than whom you are, do what you do when you are typing and you make a mistake-DELETE him from your life and start over again.

Here is my message to you:
Barbara you have surely eased the pain of many by writing this book.
Barbara you have made many including this reviewer stronger in mind and heart by having read your book.
Barbara you are an amazing woman who will not stand for anyone hurting her or those close to you. You deserves God's blessing and strength and kindness.

Diamonds are the most precious and valuable stones. Their worth never goes down. To every woman out there: YOU ARE MORE PRECIOUS THAN THE HOPE DIAMOND OR THE LARGEST STONE IN Cartier's OR HARRY Winston's. WOMEN UNITE: FAIR WARNING: NEVER AGAIN: NO MORE! WOMEN UNITE: SISTERS ONE AND FOR ALL!

This is a great book and I never give stars: I give this book FIVE RAYS OF GOLDEN SUNSHINE: NO MORE CLOUDS OR STORMS IN YOUR LIFE
Fran Lewis: Reviewer