THE QUOTABLE POKER PLAYER - The Fun-Packed Book of Poker Sayings

By Colin Jarman

Puzzles & Games

Reference

Sports & Recreation

Language: English Not Rated (NR)

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152

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READ 'EM AND WEEP with Laughter!

1500 HUMOROUS POKER QUOTATIONS
from Five-Card Stud to No Limit Texas Hold 'Em.

This volume of over 1500 humorous quotes from the poker world covers all aspects of the game. It celebrates the fun-side of poker encompassing a transatlantic theme across both the American and European views of the game.

From The Cincinnati Kid to the Poker Brat
From bad beats to Goodfellas
From Holly Madison to Phil Ivey
From home games to House of Games
From Go Fish to the Devilfish
From Poker 101 to Ocean's 11
From green felt greenhorns to Barry Greenstein
From Texas Hold `em to California Split
From The Odd Couple to Phil & Jennifer

The Quotable Poker Player includes the funniest poker-based sayings and quotations from professional players, poker celebrities, authors, humorists and journalists, as well as a choice selection from film and TV characters.

A special chapter Poker Media covers humorous reviews and comments about Poker Books, Poker Movies & Poker TV Shows.

FIRST CHAPTER (SAMPLE)

POKER IS ...

Serious poker is no more about gambling than rock climbing is about taking risks ... of course, accidents sometimes happen to the canniest experts.
Alfred Alvarez (2001)

Poker is a ragout of observation, deduction, intuition, good memory and common sense.
Dale Armstrong, Win at Gin and Poker (1977)

Poker is a game easily learned and never forgotten. It's like riding a bike. Once learned you ride for life.
Ray Michael B, Poker Farce and Poker Truth (1999)

Poker is a very selfish sport. Everybody has an opinion and everybody is right.
Joe Beever

Poker is a godless game, full of random pain.
Andy Bloch

Poker is always a minefield, whether because of unpredictable players or unpredictable cards.
Andy Bloch

Poker - the ultimate game of human interaction.
Mike Caro

Poker is a game of mistakes. You cannot win in a poker game if everybody plays perfectly.
T.J. Cloutier, Championship No-Limit & Pot-Limit Hold `em (2004)

Poker is a stimulating psychological challenge, combining guts and detective work ... a world of its own, offering all the childish appeal of secret places, special languages and staying up late at night.
Victoria Coren

Poker is the new pornography. The Internet is awash with it ... it's banned in China and it's full of excitable Scandinavians.
Rick Dacey on InsidePokerMag.co.uk (2006)

Poker: The art of civilized bushwhacking.
Nick Dandolos, Gambling Secrets of Nick The Greek (1968)

Poker is a fascinating, wonderful, intricate adventure on the high seas of human nature.
David A. Daniel,
Poker: How to Win at the Great American Game (1997)

Poker is the classic game that rewards skill, mental dexterity, money management, bluffing, luck, patience, deductive reasoning and an all-round killer instinct.
Vincent De Franco on AskMen.com (2005)
Poker is a very social game, as long as you don't mind socializing with a tired, drunk and unshaven lot who'd like nothing more than to separate you from your money.
Phil Gordon

Poker is a ruthless game. You suck their blood, then go bowling with them afterward.
Jennifer Harman in USA Today (2003)

Poker is not a game in which the meek inherit the earth.
David Hayano, Poker Faces (1983)

Poker is the ultimate monument to the anti-Musketeer code: Every man for Himself and be sure, while you're at it, kick the other guy when he's down.
Anthony Holden, Big Deal (1990)

Poker is and always has been a way of harmlessly expressing man's most deep-rooted anti-social drives.
Roy Huggins

Poker is revenge on Fate. It is the chain smoker's decathlon. It is kicking in the TV screen, hurling eggs at the Dodgem man, proving - with rumpled money as evidence - just who is boss.
Rex Lardner in Esquire's Book of Gambling (1963)

Poker is the ultimate combo of lottery and meritocracy.
Melanie McFarland in The Seattle Post-Intelligencer (2003)

Poker is ... a mathematical challenge of the sort that Britons traditionally relish: Sudoku, for cash.
Ben Macintyre in The Times (2005)

Poker is a hard way to make an easy living.
Johnny Moss

Poker is bungee jumping for the couch potato.
Henry Porter in The Daily Telegraph (1995)

Poker is the one and only game where a skilled player may hold bad cards for hours and still win the money.
John Scarne, Scarne's Guide to Modern Poker (1980)

Poker is a gambling game in the short run. Beyond the quirk of a single hand, skill takes over and twirls its moustache. The trouble is a single hand can run you out of town.
John Skow in Time magazine (1990)

Poker is neither simple nor easy. It is a rough, tough game for the brave and free, designed to separate the mugs from their money. It merely poses as a friendly game of cards.
David Spanier, The Gambler's Pocket Book (1980)

Praise and Reviews

"There are some really, really funny quotes in here"
SmokePoker.com

"Many of the 'diamond-studded' quotes had me laughing aloud"
Poker.org.uk